It’s funny, because in my mind the year ended back in September when the Jewish calendar started over; but it also never officially feels like a new year until January 1st. Call it habit, call it fitting in with the masses, it just is. That brings us to this blog tying all the loose ends of this 2018 into a nice little bow.
This year has been filled with laughter and joyous celebrations, it’s been one filled with travel and yummy food… when it could be found. This year has made me laugh until I cry, and cry until I laugh, and knowing that I have people there who will wipe away my tears for me and deal with my post crying tear stained face makes it that much easier. This year has been painful and scary, it’s been unknown and cruel, but it has created such a fire within me. The soul of a fighter is akin to that of a flame– the more you add to it the brighter the flame burns.
This year taught me an incredible amount about my worth and about what’s important.
I never really knew how memories worked and how important they actually were. This may sound silly, but it’s so true. Think about it; what memories stick out most in your mind? An incredible vacation? Your first date? Maybe the first time you had authentic New York pizza? Moments with your best friend? Or is it that time you had to get stitches? Had to go to the ER? What about that time you hit your funny bone… the. worst. What I’m trying to get at is that, the top list– the list of positive things, probably recreates in your mind a more vivid memory, one that brings you back to that time and moment of happiness. Verses, the list of negative things, which we can often times remember but not in as much detail as the good experiences.
Wow, that was a ramble to get to a point of saying: Positive memories take root much deeper than negative ones, (most times) if we let them. When I look back at this year, I remember dancing with my best friend at her wedding. I remember going to New York and the excitement I felt walking up the subway stairs at Kingston Ave. and seeing 770 and knowing I was home. It’s the memories I made with my family on our cruise, eating amazing chummus in Ft. Lauderdale that I still crave to this day. It’s those things, not the doctors appointments or surgeries in between that I let overtake my mind. Yes, I remember those, but I rather let the good things consume more space.
That should be my goal for 2019, to not let things take up space in my life and my mind that aren’t worthy. To see time as the valuable commodity that it is and take none of it for granted. Each day when I wake up there’s a prayer of thanks that I say, and my intent is to not only say it but live it. I suppose that my actual goal should be living each day with conviction, because there is never enough hours in a day or days in a week to really take it all in. I have no idea what this coming year will bring, the unknown is terrifying, but every morning that I open my eyes is a good one.
I spent a lot of time going back through this year and putting together a video, I realized from it a few things: 1.) I went to Arizona, a lot. 2.) Most things look much better with filters. 3.) Music, good music, speaks to the soul. 4.) Family, friends, and G-d are really the things that life is all about 5.) You never know how many good times you’ve had until you’re putting them into a video and you exceed the max allotted amount of time.
With that being said, and so much gratitude for all the goodness I’ve experienced, I leave you guys with my video of 2018 in review.
You are amazingly talented. The video was incredible. Yasher choach. Have a Happy New Year. Love, Susan Kaye
Thank you so much for your support and love mama Kaye!!
Nice job my love! keep the positivity going.
Love you Ma!
I love you Alejandra and I think you are so incredibly beautiful inside and out! I hope 2019 brings good times with family and friends, a pursuit of passions, feeling strong physically and emotionally, and amazing experiences and memories. Your writing is powerful and so are you my amazing niece. xoxo, Aunt Jill
Thank you so so much Aunt Jill, I love you dearly!