This is 100% intended to be a nod at the upcoming holiday of Passover, or as it’s also known and I call it, Pesach.
The Hebrew word dayenu [die-ay-new] means, “It would have been enough“. It is repeated frequently in the story of Pesach, and it’s a theme that’s become one that I’ve spent a lot of time mulling over.
Maybe it comes from a place of self pity, but I think a lot of us can look back at our lives and see tough points and think, “Wow, I went through this, and then also went through that?!”
I have these moments of profound confusion at G-d and at the world we live in. How is it possible that a world with a Creator so great, can produce such terrible things? And how can the aforementioned Creator be okay with the suffrage of His people? Haven’t we been through enough, haven’t I been through enough?
I wish I could say I understood it. I really do. Sadly, I am in a place of acceptance. I have come to realize that while life is tough, and it is more than we can handle and we want to scream at the the top of our lungs, “Dayenu!”— It’s not more than G-d can handle. He protects us even when we feel the most vulnerable.
I sit here writing this, and thinking about how tired and worn out I feel, how at the end of my rope I feel, and how at this point, “Dayenu” comes out more as a weak mutter than a strong cry for help.
But that in and of itself is the beauty of Pesach. This story is one of perseverance, survival, and G-d saving us from even the most dire of circumstances. We were led into the promised land and we were able to become a nation that still stands. If G-d can create this entire world and continue to sustain it, there is no doubt that He can take care of you.
It might drive us insane if we think too much about it, because some things just have to take with blind faith, but there is one thing I do know; this year when I’m reading the Haggadah ( the story of Passover) I will take a deep breath and pray hard at each dayenu and know that Hashem is hearing my deepest wishes– and finally, it really will have been enough.
The past few weeks have not been easy ones. The next few weeks will be packed. As long as we know what we’re fighting for and who’s on our team, I think we’ll turn out okay.
To everyone who celebrates– a koshern un freiliechen Pesach!
To all those who don’t– Happy Spring!
May this time of regrowth and introspection bring us all what we need, in abundance.